My friend Sarah posted this video and I laughed and laughed and then was left feeling kinda crummy. And then I read Leandra's latest post. I'll give you time to go check them out...
I mean, so true right? How many times do you roll your eyes while scrolling through your instagram feed? Or worse yet, actually post something yourself with questionable motives. I went to my instagram homepage to look around and evaluate why I've shared the pictures that I have. I definitely winced a little when I saw my most recent post.
Looks innocent enough, right? Until you read my caption:
"How gorgeous is this cosmetic bag?? Thanks so much @oughton!"
Hmmm, what should have been a post about a new brand that I like turned into a self promotion of how I'm so cool that I get free stuff. Or something like that. Right? Kinda reads that way. Let's just be real, I was totally doing that. But not in an "I'm better than you" way but more of a "This is so fun" kind of way. I really wasn't doing it to be an ass. But still tacky. And for the record, Oughton sent me this cosmetic bag as a thank you after they saw that I included it in my gift guide for To & From. And thank you Oughton, I totally love your entire line - it's freaking gorgeous. Wow, look at the extra press they just got. At least my big head could benefit them.
I dare you to look through your last few instagrams, tweets, facebooks, blog posts, whatever- pick your weapon and tell me if you, too, are guilty of the humble brag. Or even the brag that maybe isn't so humble. Or is there even such a thing as a humble brag?
33 comments:
Ha! Funny! I didn't think you were bragging but I have to admit I was way jelly that you receive so many awesome things. I guess people think I'm promoting brands, but I don't get paid by anybody! Guess I should say that more often!
hahaha! So I just saw that video this morning and immediately ran and did a post on it set to post later this afternoon! It's hilarious! Consider it a perk for finding fab stuff for everyone who reads your blog. You're doing the leg work to find new things and they get the benefit of those hours you spend!
I saw your Instagram post and not for one second did it come across as a hubmle brag. You have to think of blogging as a busniess sometimes and you are helping out the brand for sending you something nice. Blogging, facebook, Twitter are all humble brags from everyone. I figure there are a lot worse things to be than a humble bragger :)
That video was freaking hillarious. Made my day. But I stand by the fact that I love Instagram and looking at everyones pictures. Pretty cosmetic bag, lucky girl:)
I just read Leandra's post last night. It makes me feel a little pukey about blogging. Love your cosmetic bag though :)
Okay--that video is freaking hilarious--so is that comic strip. I think if we are all honest--we are all a bit guilty of this. Ha. I definitely don't think you come off that way--but it's always good to put yourself in check. On another note--I do like the cosmetic bag--enjoy. :)
My husband and I saw that video on Monday morning and we were dying! It's true. I've considered quitting instagram and some of my blog posts altogether for the bragging aspect. I don't want people to think I have questionable motives behind what I do and say. But, I have people ask me for more when I hold back... When they ask me to document trips through it all then I feel okay about doing so. Some people post and their showy motives are so blatantly obvious, I cannot stand it. You aren't one of those (obviously). I love everything that you post! And you're right... I read the bag post as more of a "this is so fun" because your life is so fun. I'm glad I'm a little part of it!! XO
This is so true!! I have a friend who seems to post things her husband brings her home on a daily basis (Tory Burch bags, cupcakes, flowers, jewlery). Like honestly? I love that makeup bag though!! So cute.
Xo-L
simplylowcountry.blogspot.com
In a way, isn't blogging just a fun way to be a braggart? While at the same time sharing with the world (or in my case a few friends - ha!) some fabulousness, great tips and how-to's? Think about it...we show off pics of our kids, pics of our homes, latest purchases, etc...it really is one big bragging board. But don't let that idea take anything away from it. It is YOUR space after all...if people want to put a negative spin on it, then IMO, they don't need to follow...and they can choose not to at any time. So brag/blog away and don't think anything of it! xoxo www.styleoyster.blogspot.com
You are so cute...and humble. I have never commented on your blog but have "liked" some of your IG pics - never thought for a minute you were bragging - you wear that cosmetic bag well ;)
Great post. I think this can be taken in many ways and I especially see Morgan's point. Blogging is about sharing things you are passionate about without really knowing a lot of the people you share it with (online relationships). There is a fine line between "bragging" and "sharing", but the lack of the "real" relationship makes it hard to know what the motives of that person were. Some people are more obvious then others about bragging vs sharing, but ultimately, its about being expressive and creative in each person's own way, so anything goes. I personally didn't think your Insta was "bragging"- just being thankful and happy about your gift.
-Becky
www.thepumpkinspot.com
Just read the MR post and completely agree and there are even some really good points in the comments. For me the positive reinforcement is addictive, almost having a drug-like addiction to put me in a good mood. Awful right?
That College Humor video made me laugh so hard I cried. I still think Instagram is so much preferable to Facebook - it filters out a lot more of the kind of stuff you are criticizing! Everyone can be a little vain sometimes, with or without Instagram, but I enjoy the fact it's a small window into friend's lives who I don't get to see on a day to day basis!
So funny- I need to watch this video! For the record, I would never have read into that post of yours on Instagram...I would have thought of it more like you were thanking the company for giving you the free stuff, which is what they sort of want you to do when they give you the stuff. I'm for sure guilty of the humble brag- today's post...case in point:)))
That video is hilarious...thanks for sharing. "selfie where I poop" -- awesome. I'm so shallow though that I was also focused on the girl's unfortunate jeans. :/
I think I and others are guilty of this, but I only follow (on IG) the people I'm genuinely interested in...bc I want to 'know' them more, and documenting their day helps me with that. I like knowing that you had a great time with your kids at the park, and that you're living it up with other great bloggers at fun events. Our paths may never cross physically, but my life is enriched bc of your friendship. Or my idea of our friendship ;)
but just you wait until our next trip...there will be plane wings, coffee foam, red wine, hotel suites, etc...won't you be so jealous!!! ;)
Funny you should say all this because you seem like someone that actually has a lot to brag about, yet I never see you bragging on your blog?? I don't think I would have thought bragging with that picture but I would be jealous of the freebie! On the flip side I do like it when bloggers brag a little because I get ideas/inspiration. Facebook on the other hand is really annoying so I deactivated my account! :) Feel free to brag on about your fabulosity!
Ok, you know that you've just summoned old Lucille right? ;)
I watched the video and read the article, and my opinion about it goes a little bit beyond "you're right" or "I agree", or "I'm guilty too". Just as I like to see the details, I like to see the whole picture too. And in my humble (and probably mistaken) opinion, it all goes down to the reason why we do it. I do think there's such thing as humble bragging, and the reason for it is because we all are constantly looking for approval, big or small, silly or important, it is in our human nature to connect to people in all aspects of our lives (the silly, the important, the good, the bad things). So the question to ask really is, why we do it? And when the answer is like yours, when is just about sharing something that makes you happy and that "is so fun" then I don't see the problem. Why? because I get you, I get that you are just sharing a silly, fun, happy thing and that's it. Why can't we share little things that makes us happy? Just as the big ones? They both are integral parts of our lives. And while yes, there are other ways to connect (just as Leandra says) well, all my blogging friends (and family members too) are miles and miles away from me, so this little window into my life (Instagram), as silly as it might look to a lot of people, is just a way to stay connected to all of them. Plus, I also think is a powerful tool, I find encouragement, positiveness, inspiration, and to me, there's nothing wrong with that. At the end we all have the choice to continue or stop following (or connecting) with someone, and I'm certainly not here to please everyone, I'm just passing by, trying to be a good person, if someone wants to get to know me and get to know the reasons why I do something, I'm here, and if they don't then that's fine too.
HILARIOUS!!! I, as one of your readers, have never thought of you as a bragger at all but there are a few others out there who know what they are doing. I'm not innocent either though- I have caught myself from time to time. Instagram, FB and Twitter etiquette is being established more and more every day...
I'm so glad social media was fairly new when I was in college! We didn't have Instagram, Pinterest, or twitter yet-thank the lord...I definitaly wouldn't of graduated with all these things to play with!
Loved the video girl!
The problem is that so much of the blogging platform has become all about products. Seriously, where is the freakin content? Most of the ezines are the same way. It seemed novel at first, but now it's almost like personal propaganda. Do I really need to spend 30 minutes looking at pictures of stuff someone else says is cool (regardless of any gifts). It's just getting boring.
I'm going to go out on a limb here and just point out that almost every single commenter here has assured you that you are not guilty of this behavior. But isn't that kind of the same thing as the referenced behavior itself--getting your "likes" from your blog readers? How many comments above tell you how great & non-braggy they think you are?
When you posted about the swimsuits the other day, you noted which 2 pieces you had. You didn't indicate whether they were gifted to you or you bought them, but when I clicked on the dress & the suit my jaw dropped at the prices. Good for you if that's your shopping budget reality for a damn swimsuit, but are you really saying you don't think about what kind of image that leaves your readers of your life when you post things like that, and you don't get even a twinge of satisfaction from leaving that image? I find that hard to believe--and I could name countless posts just like that from you.
Blogs have changed a lot in the past year or so. I used to read them for inspiration, but I think the links you shared finally show me they've really become more irritation. May you find a place in your life where you don't feel the need to keep climbing these mountains--towards what, I have no idea. Now let's watch to see how many commenters after this who say I'm "just jealous"...
Hi thirtysomthingsc! Thanks for reading and opening up. You're right, there are a lot of positive comments here, but I wasn't asking for them. I was just opening up about a weakness. I also agree that those swimsuits are expensive. Marysia is a really good friend of mine, and price aside, I want to support her here on the blog and share her latest (awesome!) collection with my readers as well as share which pieces I liked for myself. That was all.
I enjoy sharing the things that I love here - whether it's a $43 dress, an expensive swimsuit, or a dreamy out of (my) reach pair of shoes. I'm not climbing some mountain to nowhere, nor would I pretend to be something I'm not. I'm just being me having fun and writing a blog. It's not my intention to make anyone feel irritated, but rather, I want them to enjoy themselves when they come here. I'm sorry that you haven't. But I appreciate that you stopped by and gave it a chance.
That video cracked me up - like I watched it three times and laughed just as hard the last time as the first! ;)
Life's too short to take social media so seriously - it's supposed to be fun! I enjoy your pics - and if you post a pic of an airplane wing - I'll probably like it ;)
chassity, what a classy responce to thirtysomethingsc. i find it so odd that people find it ok to criticize those who make more than them for promoting or owning exspensive/nice things, but if you were to tell a blogger on a budget that she were too cheap or didnt have good taste -people would be outraged! all families across america make drastically different salaries, so a (business minded) blogger that only promoted items afforded by one class would be foolish.
The video was hilarious and so true it's a little scary. Im not gonna pretend like I am not the person who takes photos of my coffee...I totally do. Partly because I genuinely love coffee and partly because I think it's funny when I get a crazy amount of likes for a coffee cup. I definitely don't really take part in 'liking' other peoples photos. It's a little strange to me. I am not posting things to get 1,000 'likes' I am doing it because I live a crazy life, my whole family/friends can keep up with me no matter where they live, and I love to take photos.
*sigh* Social media is such a double edged sword...I love seeing what other people are up to, but it definitely makes the green monster of jealousy rear it's ugly head from time to time...it's hard to see that other people have things you want, right??? But really, it's not their fault, either...it's not malicious or their intent to make other feel crappy. That's completely on the person feeling that way and then you just kinda need to sort out your own issues...In the few years that we have been blogging buddies, there have been more than a couple times when I'm crazy jealous of your fab life, but I also happen to know that you are one of the most sweet and genuine bloggers around and you work your little tushie off to be such. Nothin' but love for you and your social media postin' (c;
While the video gave me a good laugh, I realized that they pretty much dissed EVERY photo anyone could ever post on instagram. So while initially felt like I should re-examine my instagram habits, I realized it would be very difficult to ever post any photo that wouldn't meet their standards for poking fun. And, I'd like to bring up something I feel is both relevant and timely: let's consider the photo holiday card. If anything, that is the perfect example of "bragging." But it is a time-honored tradition that every generation loves. So I am personally taking all of this instagram humor with a grain of salt and continuing as I always have. We can't all live life constantly worried about what other people think.
I look forward to reading your blog every day. Your positivity for all that life brings comes through the computer screen through your words. You give me a little pick me up when I read it. When you do post about products, it's usually because it is something you really love and just want to share with others, or supporting your fellow bloggers and friends by showcasing their art, swimsuits, services, etc. You come across as very genuine and not at all posting just to receive some product in return.
There is another blogger who I used to follow for she came across as so sweet and inspirational. Lately, her blog posts have seemed very transparent in trying to get some benefit by consistently posting about certain products, but not in a genuine way like you do where you tell a story behind why you bought something, where to find something, etc. Her posts are all about her bragging about something new she has acquired and it's always material items, not the genuine day-to-day appreciation for life that you write about. Her posts are 'look at the new Hermes blanked I bought, here's me in Anthropologie buying a bunch of clothes and taking pictures of myself, love the new J Crew bootsI bought'. It's very narcissistic and self-serving and I don't even think she's realized how she's completely lost touch with her viewers (though her significant decline in comments should raise a red flag). You still remember why you are blogging, stayed true to that purpose and the reason you get rewarded with product is because of that and because you've built a loyal following being true to why you started - sharing things that make you happy. Thank you for that.
Can I just say that I am so sick of people complaining about the content of blogs...like all of the grand ole dignity has left blogging. Life is short people and blogging is not that serious. Don't like em, don't read em...pretty simple.
I really don't consider it a bad thing to post a picture of something that you like or have. People choose to follow you to see your ideas and what products you may be using. Just as they followed, they can unfollow. I often post pictures on Instagram of the bag I'm using or even shoes I'm wearing. Unless you are saying "look at what I have, be jealous..." I wouldn't worry about it. I actually love when people post things like this bc I end up discovering neat products!
Just catching up on your posts now love and finally getting to reading this! I NEVER look at other peeps' freebies and think they're bragging...it's all about spreading the love and getting brand names out there...we build this community to help each other out, the intention is NEVER to make others feel unworthy. That's really their insecurities seeping through haterville...serious! You deserve it all doll- and getting the word out is part of the gratitude!
Excellent post! So relevant and thought-provoking...right up my alley!
Also- I’m hosting a décor-to-dress giveaway where 3 winners will WIN a fabulous frock of their choice just in time for the holidays! Hope you’ll stop by to enter the contest!
xo-Julie
Peace. Love. LOL!
Haute Khuuture Blog
That video is so true! :) I just forwarded it to my friend who recently became hooked.
Loved this post. I would never have thought anything about a pic where you thanked a company... There are some good ones out there, though. I'm going to look at my Instagram feed completely differently now. It'll be funny.
This is such an interesting topic -I just took a look at my instagram and thought I was doing pretty well (pics of my dog, me and my mom, diy projects) until I came to a photo of me and my new car. totally bragging. obviously bragging. but what's more interesting is that I've received more comments on that photo than many others combined. So it goes both ways and its cyclical - we post for approval/reaction, others give us that approval/reaction and the cycle continues...Like many others have said above - if one doesn't like it - don't read/follow/comment. simple as that.
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